I think I've lost my marbles.....I'm trying hard to find them. Still hanging on, but not doing too well. I saw that I still might have a shot at the overall and that's promising. I will keep moving along.
I have had a better week emotionally, but I still seem to be eating a little more than I want to be eating. I will do this these 2 weeks!

Holding on for dear life...

I'm still hanging in here. I can't believe that I let life take over......ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh we all know what I mean by that. I really am still treking along but it is getting harder and harder as things in my life are changing.

I'm still losing, and still reading all of your blogs I have just lost a lot of hours in my day. I start school tomorrow....and I'm not sure how that is going to turn out. I'm going into social work. I had three interviews last week for work, and I have another tomorrow in the AM. I've added 2 foster children to my life for the next couple of months. Yes you are reading that right. So I now have 9 under 8 in my home as we added another 2 year old and another 6 year old....why? cause that's the way I love life.

So there is the side of me that wants to just become content with being fat forever. And then there is the side of me that says....KEEP GOING!!!!!! YOU ROCK!!!!!!!

So there you have it folks I am still going.

I'm searching for motivation. It was very sad to not be in the winnings last month....but I didn't gain. I did however spend my month sitting around. I am in the clear with my hip, but it still doesn't feel right.
I am hoping for a killer month this month, I am kicking it into high gear so I can get my place back. You guys have all done so awesome and way to go this past month.

My oh My!!!!

So can't wait for my hip to be back to it's normal self. It is getting really hard to try and be careful. But last night I hurt it again.......ugh!!!! and I don't even know what I did. It had been feeling better and then OUCH!!!!! it is now in pain again. I go back in for another follow up this coming week.

I'm still doing ok if you want to say that. I am really struggling this month though. being down puts me in a state of depression. And we all know what a state of depression leads to...FOOD. I am trying hard.

I am also currently looking for full time work and that has taken it's own emotional toll on me.

Still moving along forward!

I really need someone to kick me in the rear!!!

I really need to blog! I really need to blog! I really need to blog....

I am finally allowed to be up and around on my leg, but as you may have guessed it still hurts and NO EXERCISE!!!!! I am having a really hard time losing anything this month because I'm totally down.

On the brighter side.....My hubby and I went out of town for a few days. Just got back. I was presenting at a training event for Foster Facilitators. And then I got to attend the conference and sit through classes for a few days. It was nice to get away and spend time with out all the kidos....But I ATE AND ATE AND ATE!!!!!!! It's the first time since January that i really over did it. I really enjoyed my stay at the resort that they Foster Care Foundation put us up in. I don't even want to get on the scale....

Well I am hoping that the rest of you are moving forward. I am getting back in the game and trying to lose without doing anything to hurt my body.....I want my leg to heal so bad!!!!!!!

I'm still fitting in my smaller pants...not small pants but smaller. So that's good!

AHHHHHHHHHHH!

So I shifted my femur bone from my hip socket OUCH!!!! This is by far the most painful thing I have ever experienced. I don't know what I am going to do. I have been down on the couch completely for a week and they said I very likely will be down for a month!!!! Today I had to go to an appointment that I couldn't change and dragged myself there and now I am in so much pain again. So apparently there is a reason they told me to stay off of it and to only walk as far as the bathroom with my new CANE!
So I am sitting on my couch getting FAT!!!!!!!!! I am not even eating crap but I'm not moving at all either...go figure!

I hope all of you are doing fantabulous!!!!!!

Just for you...

I changed my blog background to this lovely one. Just because I love all of you and had you in mind while creating it...:)

I really can't believe that in 3 months I have lost 33 pounds!!!!! Where'd it go? Well my exercising has paid off for me this month. I have slacked a little on my eating. I haven't done anything too terrible. Still pretty much no sugar. But I have had a few things that really don't fit into clean eating. So this month I have to get them both combine together for full force. I am determined to take 1st at least once in this comp. I am lingering around in the top 4 but I really am going to make it to the top.
Congrats to all on sticking it out and still being here in the comp. An DEBBIE I LOVE YOU!!!!!! way to go!

I may take you all by surprise!

I have slowly been treking along this month. But none the less I am still moving forward or should I say going down. I have had my own personal emotional and physical struggles this month that I can't seem to shake. I am not really veering from my goals and plans. I have some severe health issues that have flaired up these past weeks and have gotten the better of me. I am eagerly waiting for my drive, energy and focus to kick back in gear. I have not let it knock me down though it has just taken a lot out of me. Which means somethings have been left undone (like blogging and house cleaning:)etc.) I have done awesome on the exercising this month and that is a triumph for me. I know I can do this! I unfortunately have not had the amount of time needed this month to read up on everyones blogs, but I plan to sit and go through the few I have missed this week. I love reading them. They are what keeps my head in the game. So even when I haven't commented and i get on real quick I am always reading them. Thanks.

Just to update....

I am doing well as far as diet and EXERCISE! yes I said EXERCISE. I am doing it. GO ME! I am lacking in the blogging. I have been spending less time on Facebook...which means less time on the computer....which means I'm not up to par on blogging. I will need to work on that. But when I get online I want to play on FB.

So just a few quick thoughts....I am seriously considering training for a 1/2 marathon. Not sure though. I have never been fond of running. But I don't know if that is a good reason to not try. I am however one who loves to achieve something great. And wouldn't that be great to say I RAN A 1/2 MARATHON! So thinking about it.

I haven't weighed myself in a bit, so I'm not sure exactly where I'm at. But I can say I FEEL GOOD!

A week has gone by....

I can't believe that it has been a whole week since my last post. I guess I was having a blah...blah...blah...week. I wasn't doing anything yucky with me eating, so not sure why the no blogging. I have even been exercising. Well I have to exercise so I can get on Facebook. I just have been feeling blah there for lack of enthusiasm. I hope to kick out of it soon.

I weighed myself yesterday, and for those of you that are wondering I am still on the right track and moving forward.

I'm hanging in there.

My own challenge...

I really love all the energy that follows every month creating a new start. Everyone is so energized and motivated to do even better this month than the last. It brings so much drive and positive energy for each of us to continue forward.

I'm ready to up it a notch. I have been thinking this weekend about my plan of action and how I am going to kick it into high gear. Full speed ahead. Guess at this point the thing I need the most is to exercise. So I am creating a challenge for myself. I love to spend time chatting and playing dumb games on Facebook. I decided tonight that I can play as much as I want on there this month. I will keep track of all of my time. And for every minute I spend playing online I have to put into exercising that day. So to all of my Facebook friends.....just know if I don't get on there this month that I still love you.

But since I have been being so convincing that I LOVE TO EXERCISE I should be able to spend tons of time on Facebook.

So lets bring on MARCH!

A little funny...

So, I am obsessing over my pictures. Thanks Karilynn for putting them side by side for me. I can't believe the difference, and it makes me so excited.

So, funny little story I'll share. I was so thrilled with my results yesterday. I spent most of my day on cloud 9 million and 99. I couldn't focus, couldn't think, and couldn't accomplish anything. I was in my own la-la land. I needed someone to give me a reality check and bring me down to earth speed. But that didn't happen. So last night I got in the shower to deck myself out for a hot date with my hot hubby. I pulled out of a box of clothes (that have been too small) a really cute outfit. I left my hair down (which hardly ever happens), put on jewelry, make-up and even some really nice perfume. I was feeling GREAT about myself, and it has been a long time since I have felt like I looked good. I needed to go to the grocery store. So I head out on my quest for groceries, and I was ready to strut my stuff. I'm walking around the store collecting the things I needed with my mind building up how good I look and that my hubby and I were going to have a hot date (seriously strutting around the store thinking I LOOK FABULOUS). Then it hit me. "UM, HELLO!!!! (my wake up call) you are still 30 pounds overweight, and no one is really going to notice how you look." And there it was laid before me, that I still have a lot of work to do if I want to make heads turn. I very quickly came to reality that unless I ran into someone that I knew, no one there would have any idea that I have accomplished something great. I had a good laugh about it -- seriously had a good laugh about it. Then finished quickly at the store, and got home to my hubby...who thought I LOOKED FABULOUS!

So, I have a lot of work to do. If I want people's heads to turn, I have a ways to go. But it's doable, and I KNOW IT! The progress I've made just makes it clear to me that I CAN DO THIS! I can continue to lose and become healthy and feel great everyday of my life.

And the scale says....

I can't stop jumping around and being so excited. I am so happy to be down for a grand total of 24.4 pounds....that simply blows me away......

I am thrilled that I was able to pull off the weight loss I did this month. And it has just added a little more fuel to my fire. I want to keep moving along...and kick it into gear. I have been exercising more. Remember I LOVE TO EXERCISE! I am not doing it perfect but a whole lot more than not. I'm thrilled with the transformation I am making to my body.

Had to stand on the scale a few times this morning to make sure I was seeing it right. I don't know that it has really set in yet. All of the things I opted not to have...I have made myself a very happy girl this morning.

I will say month 2 was a bit harder. I can only imagine that month 3 will be even more so. With the loss I have had it begins to get easier to start justifying little tiny things....I've done really well and that Reese's big cup should be a reward. I am so trying to hold strong to saying NO! I know that ONE will hurt me! Once I've justified one thing it gets easier to justify more. So tonight I will make my flax seed pudding (cause I really liked it) and I will celebrate my loss!

Oh my weigh in this morning was 154.6 down from 164.4 last month.

Big weigh in coming....

It's like Christmas. I can hardly wait to see how I have done. I know I haven't posted everything for anyone that wanted to keep track. I really wasn't trying to keep everything a secret. I have just had a crazy month. I know that I had it in me to do a little more, but I am hoping that I have done enough. I am feeling pretty confident about myself right now. I have had a fair month. I have gone down and down and down....and that makes me excited. I have not been weigh in regularly so I too, will be surprised with my results tomorrow morning. I have an idea.... and I know we will all be on here checking everyones blogs in the AM. good luck and here's to tomorrow.....

I LOVE TO EXERCISE!!!!

NOT! I love to exercise. I love to exercise. I love to exercise. I am trying to convince myself that it is something I love to do. I'm not being very convincing. I HATE IT! I am still very much struggling in the exercise department. But I know what I eat is what really, really matters. So I should leave the cheesecake in my fridge alone...it doesn't need me.
I can't even tell everyone how excited I am that there is another weigh-in this Friday. I can't wait. I haven't done as good as I know I could have done. But I don't think I totally have failed this month either. It will be fun to see how we all have done.
I have pants that no longer fit. And I mean really no longer fit. I have to get rid of them. One of the pairs are my absolute favorites. Funny thing is I don't want to get rid of them... but I don't intend to ever fit in them again, so away they will go. They are a pair of slacks, and I'll tell you what, slacks are not meant to be big in the hips and saggy in the butt. They no longer look very nice on me.

One thing I have really missed this month is my blogging. I know I've said it before -- and you will all be sick of hearing me say it again -- but I'm going to try hard again to blog everyday. This month, I let life take over and I failed to blog. I do so much better when I am blogging, and I pull great positive motivation and energy from reading all of yours.

Good luck everyone on your final days!
oh yeah, and I LOVE EXERCISE!

I'm back!

Gotta get my blog in today. I'm not going to let it be the reason why I don't win this month. I have had a very long week with more house guests than anyone would expect. The last of them leave tomorrow. We got through the funeral. It was so emotional and draining. I hosted 10 house guests plus my family of 9 (We have 4 bedrooms and 1 bathroom in our home that are functioning). I am worn out. It kind of blew my exercising for the week. I really couldn't fit in one more thing. But I did awesome on my eating, still. Turned down junk; turned down sugar; turned down everything that wasn't clean. Even in the midst of 20 people, I was able to make my own and eat what I needed to.
So I did great on eating until today....for old time's sake, my dad took me to a car-hop that he went to growing up, and I went to growing up. He is flying home to Alaska tomorrow and wanted to head to get a fresh-lime and a burger from "Peach City" for old times. I couldn't resist and I tried to get something good on the menu...but they have been there since the 1930's, and everything is pretty much burgers and fries, not even a salad on the menu board. So that started it....and then...I got an offer not to refuse...and probably will never happen again. I got to go to a Utah Jazz game with my hubby, with VIP treatment....and no, not VIP treatment from him. We had VIP passes. They included a lovely dinner with fantabulous food, and a wonderful assortment of desserts. Then off to watch the game from row 20 (so close). Then back to the VIP room for popcorn and nachos. The Jazz won! The night was great! And I enjoyed myself. Like I said, the chances of ever having VIP passes again is next to never. So only one day blown. Not bad, I must say.
Well, as of tomorrow, I will be back to a little more normal. It was nice to see all of my family, but they really threw off my groove.
Thank you for all of your kind words and condolences for the loss of my cousin. He will be greatly missed.

Today has been hard...

I'm an emotional eater. And today has been very emotional. My cousin died very unexpectedly this morning. He had a blood clot in his lungs. He is 31 and leaves a wife and 3 little daughters. I have been so emotional with this that I really wanted some of my favorite comfort foods. Okay, maybe not just some, a lot of my favorite comfort foods. So I did the best thing I could justify. I grabbed my jar of almond butter and a spoon lol (really only ate a little...and it wasn't the same as sugary peanut butter). But I tried. He was one of the best people I know, the kind that would always make laughter fill a room and drop anything he was doing to help someone, even if it meant driving 6 hours to help them.
So tonight I am not really up to blogging. I think I will go sleep instead of eat.

I Love Junk Food!

I wanted to eat some junk today really bad. I am currently surrounded by candy bars, cupcakes, valentine's cookies, and supersized pretzels with cheese sauce. I even know where a good size stash of Reese's peanut butter cups are (good thing they're not the big cup, because those I can't refuse). So, like I said, I wanted to eat some....but I didn't. I didn't do it. I didn't even find something to substitute in for the craving. I simply chose not to eat. I am trying really hard this week to eat during my set hours of eating. I even brushed my teeth right after dinner so I wouldn't want to eat anything else.

Snacking is my major weakness. I can snack on good or bad food. That makes no difference. I have decided that I really enjoy the process of eating. I just do. So I am finding that since I'm not eating all the time, I have a little time on my hands. Well, not a ton, because I am always busy. But I am finding that I have idle time that I would usually be eating. During these little bits of time, it is very hard for me to not choose to eat. So I am going to have to start to fill that time with something so I'm not just sitting in my kitchen staring at what I would like to eat. I could easily fill it with more laundry, or cleaning...then I would have a shiny clean home. But I don't think that will work. I think that I need to fill the time with something that brings me enjoyment so that I can like it as much as I like eating....sorry just rambling on here.

I'm already starting to get nervous about where everyone will be at for the next weigh in...and there is still soooooooo much time left. But I just don't know where I'm at compared to the rest of you, and that is hard. I read your blogs of your success, and then I panic.....what if I'm not doing enough?

So not fair!

Oh to blog....So I took a couple of days off...because I was frustrated and mad! So I worked really hard last week -- really hard. I exercised and exercised and ate well and worked really hard. Probably my hardest week. But my body didn't seem to care that I added the exercise in, except that I was sore all over. My body decided not to shed any pounds. I was so sad. What torture. Really hard to see the scale not go down. I lost so much with no exercise, so it makes it really hard to believe that the exercise will be worth it. But I am not going to give up. I took a couple of days off. I had a nice Valentines. I even ate some chocolate (What can I say? I was mad and worked hard, and it hadn't paid off. So what would the chocolate hurt? :)) <- smiley face with double chin.)

First thing this morning I am back on going strong. I am heading forward with more force than before. Apparently making me mad makes me want it more! I still plan to win! I still plan to exercise! I still plan to eat clean. I upped it a notch this week even more strict than before! I am still going to have the body of my dreams! I'm here going strong with more will power than before.

As for the challenge this week...well lets say I might be able to argue that my posture problems are worse than my weight problems. My hunchback is worse than the pictures Karilynn posted. Now you all are picturing me like a camel with a hump on my back. But seriously, all kidding a side, I have terrible posture. It is very painful to hold my sternum up and my shoulders back. Has been an issue for years. I even bought a special brace several years ago to wear. That helped for a short while, but then the brace hurt so bad to wear, I gave it up. I will try my best to work on my posture this week. I know it looks so nice when my posture is good. I just don't know that I can fix years and years of damage there. I guess I'm trying to fix years and years of damage on my weight, so all things are possible.

I am still trying to finish my list of excuses...I think I've got them...
1. I'm too tired.
2. I want it to come off overnight.
3. I'm not that fat. It could be worse.
4. But...I LOVE food!
5. I don't have the time.
6. Rationalization.
7. Food makes me feel better.
8. I've always eaten this much...it didn't effect me when I was younger.
9. Exercising hurts!

Well, there they are...and I'm trying hard to ignore them so I can keep moving forward! I have become too content with the way I am. But I really am not happy in this body! I want to feel GREAT! I want to look GREAT! I want to be GREAT! I know I sound snobby, but seriously, don't we all want to look good and feel good?

Last thing FYI, as for now, I am not going to update my ticker for a couple of weeks. I'm going to wait and let us all be surprised. I don't know yet if I will wait until the weigh in or do it before...but for now, we wait. I can't bare getting on the scale again and it not going down...Let the pounds fall off. I'm off to work out. I already did my short program this morning. Now for the really HARD and PAINFUL longer workout.

Excuse #2

So I have been thinking, thinking, thinking. I would have to say that the next excuse that I have is...

2. I want the weight to come off over night. I really don't want to have to focus and work on it. That takes time and can be challenging. So over the years I have looked for many fast fixes. I guess by now I have realized they don't really exist. I have lost weight here and there...and I have always managed to put it back on. I want to go to bed one night and wake up the next morning smaller. Is that too much to ask? So if it can't come off over night then I can't lose anything...it's too hard to work at. There's the excuse "it takes too long."

So I am trying to decide how often I want to weigh myself. I am undecided I am considering, every day, once a week, twice a month, or once a month. I see pros and cons to all of them. So as it stands right now I have not updated my ticker since the BIG WEIGH IN.

It is so nice to be back on track with the blogging. Makes me feel really good inside. I look forward to sitting down at night and writing my thoughts down once the kids are in bed and all is quiet.

My sweet daughter got to be the devils advocate today... She was eating Valentine's Conversation hearts, and she picked out some special ones just for me. So sweet of her. They said "You're #1" "Love you" "You're the Best." I wasn't planning on eating them.I said thank you and tucked them away....until she laid it on thick..."It's not like one will hurt you....They're not going to make you fat....I picked them just for you....Pleeeeeaaaaaasssssseeeee...But mom I love you...." So I ate my 3 little hearts so she knew I loved her back. Just bummed because if I was going to break and eat sugar...I would not have picked conversation hearts.

Well off to do my "slim in 6". Then on to another day.....

Excuse #1

Here I sit and wonder how in the world am I going to do my "Slim in 6" program tonight. I am slowly dieing. I'm sure of it. It's going to be a slow painful death. Translation...I HURT EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!! Seriously, my 3 whole days of exercise has done me in. My abs are so sore that it hurt like crazy when I had a little coughing fit today. I really want to curl up in a fetal position and go to sleep for the night...but curling up hurts because my butt and legs hurt. I think that running the bleachers at the rec center is what did me in. I just keep telling myself over and over in my mind...IT WILL BE WORTH IT! IT WILL BE WORTH IT! I WANNA WIN! I WANNA WIN! KEEP GOING! And I continue to push myself forward to endure to the end.
I was so proud of myself last night. I had every reason in the world to not do my "Slim in 6." To start with, I had already exercised that morning. But I got my running shoes on and got my resistance bands out and my water...and 47 minutes later I was sweating like crazy. I DID IT!
Well, I decided that I would treat myself to my own Valentine's Day present. I bought the new Tosca Reno cookbook and her Revised Eat Clean Diet book. I am so stoked. I can't wait to have a few minutes to look them over.
So I think the only way I am going to write up my excuse list is to do it a little at a time. I have too many excuses, so the task at the moment is a little overwhelming. Here is a start: 1. I'm tired! All of the time. I suffer with chronic fatigue, and I can't ever seem to get enough sleep.

Thanks for everyone's support! I love reading what you're doing and what drives you.

I'm on fire!!!!

So if you missed it....yesterday I posted what I want to achieve...ok not totally true. I wrote it yesterday and forgot to post it. When I posted it today, it posted with yesterday's time. So if you missed it, read my post before this -- if you're interested.

Today is so AWESOME and I feel great! Of course I am doing great on the clean eating. And now that I am blogging again, I am 100% focused on what I am eating. But the best part about everything is I am so motivated to go for 1st place this month. 3rd was great, but it wasn't 1st.
I did the unthinkable! I exercised! Last night I did a fantastic work out, "Slim in 6." Then, this morning I was so on fire that while waiting for my daughter at the skating rink, I ran the bleachers. Yikes! That was kind of killer. Then, to top it off, I did the "30 day shred" workout this morning. Now, tonight, I have to do my "Slim in 6" workout still, and then start again tomorrow. I know you're thinking "What the..." Well, as the pounds start melting away, and I get smaller and smaller, you can blame Debbie. See, to check out the video, I went and did the "30 day Shred" with her. But I committed myself to the "Slim in 6," so I have to do it. I HAVE TO DO IT! Even though I already worked out today, I have not done the program I committed to doing each day. So I have to do it, "finish what you start." I don't intend to do that much exercise everyday, but who knows. I am so stoked.
I did one more unthinkable thing! I ate Tofu! Yep. I know to some, it's not so out there. To me...instant gag reflex. But I actually think I like what I made. Granted, no one would ever know there was tofu in it. I made the Tofu Chocolate Mousse in Tosca Reno's cookbook. So healthy and a great treat. I am not a huge chocolate lover though, so I think I might try to experiment with it and make a different flavor. It's mostly made of tofu, there's no sugar in it unless you choose to use bad chocolate. SO maybe I will be brave and try tofu in something else.
I haven't made my list of excuses yet for this weeks challenge. Mostly haven't done it because I am too busy making excuses of why I can't make the list of excuses. lol
Keep going strong everyone!!!

I want to Achieve!!!

I've been trying to focus on this weeks challenge today. So I'm going to blog the first section.
What I want to achieve...
1. I will look so good that I make people's heads turn. (their heads already turn, because I walk by with 7 kids)
2. I will be successful in making a life style change.
3. I will feel healthy, beautiful and strong.
4. I will be in excellent health.
5. I will be able to reach my ideal weight and stay there.
6. I will teach my children by example the importance of taking care of yourself.
7. I will (as Karilyn says) "Finish what I start".
8. I will make exercise part of my life.

I'm still making excuses to come up with the list of excuses...lol

I've learned a few things...

Things I've learned...

1. Being in the winners circle is fantastic! What an awesome thing to achieve. Really
makes a person feel good about themselves. I really am so happy that I made it in the top 4. The only thing that could have been better would be to have WON! Next time.

2. Writing about it means more than one knows. I was thinking about what might have made the difference. I did best when I was very consistently blogging everything. I worked harder at my clean eating when I talked about it. I had more positive energy when I was writing about it. Taking 10 minutes to write my thoughts, feelings, and actions kept my focus strong.

3. When life gets busy....I slack! K I didn't actually do awful, but I did worse the busier I got. Still made good choices in my diet but not the best. Sometimes convenience overpowers health. Let me clarify: it wasn't like I was eating microwave TV dinners and donuts but instant white rice instead of 30 minutes to cook brown. Or I would eat regular pasta instead of quinoa. I still tried hard to keep within clean eating for the most part.

4. Saying "no" to the foods you love is always a challenge. I must pride myself on the ability to pass up the things I love because right now I am doing it. It gets harder every day. Having gone 1 month without a Reese's Big Cup is killing me: I want one so BAD! But I know that if I eat one right now, I will eat 15 more before I stop. So I must contain myself. I also have noticed how hard it is to fix food for my family and other people, and not snack on or sample it. My best fix for this is right before I start cooking I put gum in my mouth. Then I seem to not try everything.

5. Thinking yourself skinny will work. I know: silly. But I believe that when I try hard to think skinny, I have so much more will power. It motivates me to become something. I act skinny, and by acting skinny, I eat less and keep moving throughout my day. I also have better posture when I think skinny.

6. Exercise! Need I say more. By now I must come to grips with reality. Exercise WILL help me. So I know that I could have lost more, and I could have done better. I only exercised 1 day out of the whole 1st month of the competition, and I managed to lose 14.6 pounds (must have been a killer work out j/k). So I know I could have done better. I could have lost more. I NEED TO EXERCISE.

Well, I wanted to share somethings I have learned. I am taking what I have learned, picking up and applying it to this month. I truly am proud of the loss that I have accomplished, and it gives me all the more drive to push forward.

OH YEAH!!!!

I am so blown away! I kept weighing myself...I did it, I did it, I did it! I am soooooo happy with my weigh in this morning. I almost can't believe my eyes. I haven't gotten my "after pics taken yet" but I just couldn't contain my excitement and had to post the weight loss pic. So here it is



Next time I will remember to turn the flash off. The white floor with the white paper and white scale, really bleaches the picture.(I am not so good with the camera I will figure out how to turn off the flash eventually) But no matter how you look at it. It says 164.4!!!!! Yippy!

Like Christmas!

Can I just say I am giddy and nervous and excited all the same time. Like a kid at Christmas I just can't wait to see what tomorrow will bring. I am really very excited to see what happens. I am completely totally happy with the progress I made this month! It was a great start. Rather I win any $ or not, I DID IT! I WAS SUCCESSFUL! I HAVE LOST WEIGHT! and that is all I needed for me to feel like I have won. But either way....I am so nervous.....and excited.

I wish that I was one the lost weight when I was stressed....but I am a stress eater. So I have a very busy week this week, and am feeling the stress. Which means it is taking everything in me not to bust out a package of candy bars, and break out the ice cream, along with freshly made cookie dough. My stress will eventually pass, but until then it is so hard.

Lets keep moving forward! February is going to be AWESOME!

I am actually blogging...

Okay, so it is time to pick up the pace and get back on the road to success. No more time off from blogging, and it doesn't matter how tired I am. I NEED to blog. I need to talk about the life changes I am trying to make. I am so much more focused when I do this. So here I am back on track. I am still eating well, but I am getting a little lazy at making sure that I have my carbs, and proteins, and that I'm getting 6 little meals a day. The other thing is that since I've been so busy, I haven't been faithfully reading your blogs everyday, and I have missed the power and motivation that is provided through this. It is interesting how quickly we mom's forget to do the things we need to, to take care of ourselves. You would think that through the years I would realize how much more happy I am and how much smoother things go with my family when I take care of me. It's almost like I need to write in on my planner and block off a big section that says "MOM TIME".
So this week, I can notice a difference in my weight loss. My face looks better, and I was able to squeeze into a size 12 pant (down from 14). It is truly amazing at how great a few pounds lost can do for a person.
I am getting nervous about the big weigh-in on Friday. I can't wait to see how we all do. Let's keep moving forward!

Eating to be polite...

So currently here in my house we are having 2 Taiwanese exchange students stay with us for 2 weeks. It has been really fun. But I am having a really hard time with my "clean eating". They brought us some great gifts from Taiwan, many of them food. Cookies, and candy etc. and my neighbor got cake that she shared with me. Anyways, I ate the first candy to be polite and appreciate the gift, which I am sure most of you would agree was the right choice as the 2 girls were eager to see if I liked it. Well, then I at a second candy, simply because I liked the first, and then I ate a 3rd candy justified by the fact that I can't read the ingredients. So there you have it, I tried one of the cookies and one of the pineapple cake. And mmmmmmm........ I would be willing to bet that all these treats are still no where near as "junkie" as American treats, they don't seem to use much sugar nothing is very sweet. But still they are not in my eating plan. The other hard thing is that we are trying to give them the "American experience" and so I found myself eating a slice of pizza last night with them, so that they would eat it. I only had one small slice and filled the rest of my plate with salad. This is very hard. I feel that they might be concerned if I feed them one thing and then eat another. And feeding them things made from quinoa and flax etc. is not the "American experience". I am still trying as best I can. But it has become challenging. I have worked so hard this month on my clean eating and I really don't want to re laps and have to start all over again.

Well I will keep going as strong as I can, and hope the few little splurges won't cost me the weight I have already lost.

Not so thrilled...

You know, when TOM comes around, he really can kick a girl in the rear, and it's hard to pick up the pace. So I will settle for a 1.2 pound loss and go with that. Next week I will aim higher. Still doing good with the eating and not giving in... but it has been hard this week. I think that a lot of it had to do with that I have been so busy I haven't been blogging, and the blogging really makes me focus hard on what I am trying to achieve. I haven't been getting enough sleep, which makes me want to refuel my body with more food.
Well, one more week till the big weigh-in. Good luck everyone! We are all making such great changes in our lives!

Threw in the towel...

I'll bet you all thought since you didn't hear from me yesterday that I threw in the towel. Well keep wishing...still going strong. LOL. I wanted to blog last night, but my honey needed the computer, and I went to bed. So here I am...

I'm getting a little more creative in what I am eating and still enjoying it. Curious if anyone has tried a quince. It is a fruit I picked up the other day. I was so excited to try it. I ran a search online to see how to fix it...and you have to cook it. Seriously, this yellow fruit looks like a deformed lemon the size of a grapefruit with a little of a pear shaped core and rock hard. You peel it and cook it for 1 hour -- 1 whole hour. It changes to a pink color and then you can eat it. Well, I peeled mine and cored it, which was really hard because it was like a rock. I put it in the pan to cook. I forgot about it...and we all know what happened about 2 hours later...It was burnt to the bottom of my pan. LOL. So I will have to try again sometime.

The exciting news is my pants are slightly sliding down!!!!

I am still not doing well with the exercise. I think part of the problem is I am tired all of the time. Then, exercise becomes one more thing. I am trying hard to get more sleep so my body can have the strength to exercise. But baby steps -- one thing at a time. I know Tuesday was just here, but I can't wait to jump on my scale again. I now am very happy with my 2.4 pound loss. As long as that scale keeps going down, I'll keep moving on.

Weigh in today; I lost a whopping 2.4 lbs....I guess I was hoping for a little more. But I should be really excited. That's a 10.8 pound loss in 2 weeks!!!! GO ME! I am having a rough day...but still hanging in there.

I was thinking about cheating for the first time: I want some ice cream! Only because my husband has left it sitting out on the counter for the past hour. So I want just one bite. How bad would that be? And would it really effect me? But then I know one bite leads to one more bite, and then I might as well have a whole bowl...So I picked up Tosca Reno's book and am rereading the section on cheating. So let me share with you from her book to give us all a little strength, for when we do happen to cheat (which I haven't chosen to do yet). "Believe it or not, cheating serves a purpose. Once you've indulged in your particular brand of sin, the pleasure is short-lived. The treat tastes good while you're indulging but soon afterwards you feel as if you've made a big mistake." It causes you to focus on all the hard work you had accomplished to this point. And can help to re-motivate you to head forward in the direction you are going to a healthy body.

So I have chosen to not have the ice cream. I have done so good, and I am determined to stay committed. So here is one more quote from her book that rings true..."One of the most difficult decisions you can make is to go on a diet. Tougher still is staying on it." I AM STAYING ON IT!

Yummy salad!

Karilynn, thanks for the water info and challenge. Today I measured my water intake just from what I would normally drink to see where I was at. Like I said yesterday, I love water, and by 12 pm, I had already consumed 72 oz. Now at the close of tonight -- and I know I will have another glass or two -- I am at 146 oz. So, apparently I don't have too much of a problem consuming enough water. But good to know. I knew I drank a lot but had no idea that it was that much.

Well, I did it! I exercised today! Yeah me!!!! That is huge; let's see if I can do it again.

I'm looking forward to weighing in tomorrow morning. But I am trying hard not to get my hopes up. 8.4 lbs in one week is a lot. I have worked just as hard this week but haven't had the mental psych this week that I had last.

I tried a fantastic salad recipe -- that I loved -- today. I found it on a 101cookbooks.com. I'll share it with you.

Pan-Fried Chickpea Salad

1 tablespoon clarified butter, olive oil, or coconut oil

2 cups cooked chickpeas (garbanzo beans), pat them completely dry with clean dish towel

1 cup of chopped leeks

1 medium clove of garlic, minced

zest of one lemon

1/3 cup plain yogurt

1 to 11/2 teaspoons curry powder (or to taste)

scant 1/4 teaspoon fine grain sea salt

1/2 cup of loosely packed fresh cilantro, chopped

1/2 cup red onion or red spring onions, chopped

Heat the cooking oil in a large skillet and add the chickpeas. Saute over medium-high heat, stirring occasionally, until they start getting a bit golden in color. Stir in the leeks and cook until the chickpeas are more golden and the leeks have browned a bit as well, roughly 7 - 10 minutes total. At the last minute, stir in the garlic and the lemon zest. Remove from heat, and set aside.

While the chickpeas cool, make the yogurt dressing by combining the yogurt, curry powder, and salt in a small bowl. Taste, adjust, and set aside.

When you are ready to serve the salad, toss the chickpea mixture with most of the cilantro and most of the chopped red onion. Add about 1/2 of the yogurt dressing and toss again. If you like more dressing, keep adding until you are pleased. Serve on a platter sprinkled with the remaining onions and cilantro.

Serves 4 as a side.

I really enjoyed this most while it was hot. It was also good once it had chilled. I added some chopped tomato to it, and that was way yummy. I probably had a little closer to 3/4 fresh chopped cilantro. And I didn't have any purple onion, so I didn't put any in.

Hope you have a GREAT WEEK THIS WEEK! PRESSING FORWARD WITH WEEK 3!

Water is my drink of choice! I don't really anticipate it being very hard for me to consume 85 oz of water. I have never measured my water intake, so I am curious to see if I consume that much. If I had to guess, I would say I already do. I drink a ton every day. So here I go to this weeks challenge.

Still very much enjoying my eat clean diet. I am surprised by a couple of things:

First, that I am being able to stick with it and turn down things I love with out hesitation. Crazy things have been happening; like, who in their right mind craves broccoli?

Second, that I have absentmindedly cut most meat out of my diet. I am getting the proteins that I need according to Tosca Reno's plan by eating other protein rich foods; like, egg whites, almond butter, cottage cheese, plain yogurt, and beans. The reason this is so surprising to me is that I am truly a meat and potatoes girl. I LOVE MEAT! I would have never thought that I could eliminate so much and be OK with it. I grew up with having meat -- lots of meat at every meal, and over the years I have done the same with my family. And this past week I had meat 2 times in very small quantities. WOWZA!

I keep rereading Tosca Reno's book, and it seems like every time I reread a chapter, something different stands out. I am enjoying this; it is helping to keep my drive strong! She says I will lose weight faster if I am exercising every day. I fully intend to work on this, this week. I know I said that last week, but I think I have a plan this time :).

I am soooooo tired today. I have worn myself out. I wish I could say it was from exercising, but nope, just life. I have to say that week two has been a little tougher, and I have had to focus really hard on making sure I am eating correctly. My two hardest things right now that I am working on are: one, making sure I am eating slowly and not on the run -- taking the time to eat my meal. And second, making sure I am eating enough. I know that sounds silly, but I have found a couple of times where I will just eat some yogurt and try to call that a meal, but it doesn't work. I am trying to make sure I get enough carbs and proteins in my diet. Well, I will try harder this coming week to get exercise in my life. Keep moving forward!!!

Date Night!

Well, tonight was my date night with my hubby. We're cheap and broke, so we date in. This year I am trying something new...dates with themes. Well, anyways, that's not the important part, but when I had planned out our themes, I had certain food in mind to match the theme of the date. This morning it hit me...tonight was gourmet burgers, fries, coleslaw, and something really yummy for dessert, like Mississippi mud cake. There was no way I could eat all that, so I had to think fast. I made delicious turkey burgers on multi grained flat bread with avacado, tomato, lettuce, and a thin slice of cheese. On his, I added ham and more cheese :). We had baby potatoes oven roasted in olive oil and onion salt with lots of steamed broccoli and carrots. It was great! For dessert I made this flax seed pudding that turned out very tasty.

So here is the thing that is nuts; I couldn't finish my turkey burger. I COULDN'T! I was so stuffed and had half left. Well, I did the stupid thing and forced myself to take a few more bites because it tasted so good. Still didn't finish it though. It was too much to eat, and I made my tummy hurt. I didn't finish my potatoes or my veggies. There is still a lot of food left on my plate. So what is so crazy is that last week I maybe would have had 1 1/2 burgers, or even possibly 2. YIKES!

My hubby is so good at going along with all the strange things I am currently making because I know he would have loved having Mississippi mud cake. It's his favorite. But no complaining: he thought it all tasted great. Here is the recipe for the dessert we had tonight.

Flax Pudding

6 TBS flax seeds

2 cups soy milk, or skim milk (I used soy)

1 Banana, peeled and mashed

1 TBS pure honey

juice of one orange

1 apple peeled and diced, (I didn't put the apple in)

Grind your flax seed in a food mill or coffee grinder. Bring milk to a boil, add ground flax to milk and boil for about 30 seconds. Remove from heat and let cool in a glass bowl. The mixture will get thick, and should have a consistency similar to pudding. Add remaining ingredients. Whisk mixture to make it fluffy. Chill. When ready to serve, top with diced kiwi, strawberries, raspberries, sliced banana, blueberries, or whatever else you'd like. I really liked the flavor of the pudding with the kiwis and raspberries.

So taste wise, this was fantastic. I would have had seconds if I wasn't so full. My hubby had seconds. But to warn you, the pudding mixture looked a little more like slime, so I was a little nervous about texture issues in my mouth. But once you are eating it, it is like pudding texture. Strange but true. This is from Tosca Reno's cookbook. Hope some of you enjoy it. I will be having it again for sure.

Hope everyone has had a FANTABULOUS week!

Soup anyone?

I'm in heaven with dinner tonight! It was great and all 9 of us in the house agree it was good, even the baby who had fourths. So what did I make... It was a wonderful soup all fresh veggies and pretty much fat free....I found it on another website, and tweaked it. Here's the recipe:

Creamed Zucchini Spinach Soup

3 tablespoons olive oil

2 cloves garlic, chopped

1 large onion, roughly chopped

big pinch of sea salt

2 1/2 cups potatoes (2 medium) cut into 1/2-inch cubes

2 1/2 cups zucchini (2 medium), chopped

4 cups vegetable stock (if you wanted I'm sure it would be fine with chicken stock)

4 cups fresh spinach leaves, loosely packed

1 cup fresh cilantro, chopped

In a large pot over medium-high heat, add the olive oil, add the garlic and onions and saute for a few minutes along with pinch of salt - just until they soften up a bit. Stir in the potatoes and zucchini. Add the stock. Bring to a simmer and cook until potatoes are cooked soft. Add spinach and stir a few seconds, it will wilt. Now stir in the cilantro. Puree with a hand blender until smooth ( you may be able to put in blender, didn't try that). Add a squeeze of lemon juice. Add more salt if needed. Enjoy. This is very creamy because of the potato. I added a tsp of sour cream to my kids' bowl for them to stir in and make it creamy. I added a tsp of yogurt cheese, that I made, to mine (this is made from plain fat free yogurt, and has the consistency of a soft cream cheese, minus the fat).

I served it with fresh hot from the oven homemade whole wheat bread (geepers made 4 loaves and have 2 left), and a side dish of spaghetti squash. Mmmmmmm...

So I was thinking about it today and wondering if anyone would have interest if I took the time to post a recipe of the week or of the day? Maybe it would be for my enjoyment more than yours, let me know what you think.

I've had a little bit of a rough day, just lacking a little drive for some reason, not sure why. I sure am hoping that tomorrow picks back up to how I was doing, or better. I didn't give into eating anything, just kind of felt blah. I did make some yummy cookies that work with clean eating, thanks Karilynn for the recipe. :) That gave me a little pick me up this afternoon, I only wanted the dough really. I took the time today to catch up on every one's blogs, it was sure fun to read them. I really enjoy hearing how everyone is doing.

Tomorrow is another day, lets hope its a great one!

What do you do with a 8.4 pound loss?

So I'm not sure if it has fully registered that I actually loss 8.4 pounds. But then I don't know that I should be surprised. After a week of no sugar or artificial sweeteners, no bad carbs, no red meats, no preservative or additives, etc., etc., etc., I earned an 8.4 pound loss. Having a start up week with a loss like that really adds fuel to my fire, so this week I am eating my buckwheat every morning and not complaining.

It is so nice to not feel like I am constantly hungry all of the time. I am eating much smaller meals than I use to, but they are so filling. I am truly amazed, as I look at thesmaller quantity of food now verses before, and before I got hungry. I have to remember to continually have my 6 small meals a day. That is not something that I am use to. But I noticed, like today, I missed my mid morning snack, and by lunch time I was hungry, which makes it a little harder to not snack on the things while fixing the kids' food. Funny thing is that last week I didn't count any calories or anything like that. I just ate however much I wanted because I was eating clean. Well now after my loss this week, I am really nervous that I might eat too much. LOL. But I am sticking to what I have been doing: 6 meals a day, complex carbs, and proteins at each. It worked last week; it will work again.

It was a nice victory to have the loss after passing on a few things that I wouldn't have before. My kids were so proud of me, and my hubby too.

I think I found a quick dinner/lunch that I really love: 4 egg whites whipped, then add the following chopped fresh veggies; tomato, zucchini, green onion, bell pepper, and cilantro. It is so simple and I really love it. A really yummy sweet treat that I like is poached pears with cinnamon and nutmeg.

I'm moving forward this week, even stronger than the last! I feel great and am going on!

HOLY SMOKES!!!

WOW! I can't believe my eyes...I would think my scale is broken but I weighed myself over and over again and it was the same! The same! The same! So worth waiting for the excitement! An 8.4 pound loss!!!!!!!!! Week one down. Now on to week two. I'm all excited to keep moving forward! GO GO GO !

I Woke Up Skinny?

This morning I woke up and I felt so SKINNY! Yeah, what a great feeling...then I looked in the mirror. lol. I was still me. I am going to weigh myself in the morning! I can't wait to see the progress I made this last week. If I didn't lose anything, I will cry. But I am pretty confident that I had to have gone down. I have worked so hard on the eating that I hope it pays off.

Today I came across a really cool website of yummy recipes that are natural and organic. There are a couple that you might have to make some substitutions in depending on what foods you are allowing in your diet. I am so excited to start trying some of them. The site is www.101cookbooks.com. I think that I will try one of her cookie recipes tomorrow. There are a couple that look yummy. I'll keep you posted on what I think.

This week I am working on sitting when I eat, so I take time to enjoy my food and allow my body to enjoy my food. No more eating while running around or running out the door: when you do that you don't eat as well. I almost always sit and eat with my family at dinner, but breakfast and lunch I need to work on. I often eat bites here and there, and then before I know it, I've eaten more than I intended.

Think skinny! Be Skinny!

Not Even Being Tempted...

It's almost been a week. Can't wait to weigh myself. Headed into this week with great recipe ideas that I can't wait to try.

So what is really crazy is that I am not craving anything. And I am being able to pass on everything that I usually wouldn't. My honey got out ice cream tonight, and I didn't even want any. It was weird that it was so easy to not be interested. In the past, I have taken a few weeks to build up to that real will power. On the first week, I would have justified how good I've been and had a little. But nope, not this time. No sugar this week! I've had a couple of sweet things, like figs, and apricots, and other fruit, but not that yucky white sugar. And I have no sugar craving....so strange. I can attribute this to one major thing that I am doing different this time... I am blogging. Just writing every day for other people to read is making a huge difference to me.

Another thing is that I know when I am eating clean I am giving my body what it needs and what it truly wants. My body doesn't crave, because it isn't lacking the nourishment. Another great thing about eating clean is you eat less: you are filling yourself with good wholesome food and not empty calories. Like dinner tonight I made brown rice, with yummy chicken and peach sauce. I wanted seconds but I was too full. Had baked cabbage and it was delicious. I could have eaten the entire 9x13, but I was stuffed. The flip side of changing your diet is...today I am gassy and my tummy is turning and turning and turning...lol but it too will pass (no pun intended) lol.

I'm loving eating clean again!

I had dessert...

Today was another day, but what was great about today?...I decided to have dessert. Yeah, I know what you're all thinking. But you know what I'm thinking? You're going to be putting a whole lot of money in my pockets!!!!! LOL

My dessert was a combination of sliced apples cooked with blackberries, topped with a crumble of whole wheat flour, oats, and olive oil. And you were all thinking I had cheesecake with chocolate sauce. Considering that its sugar comes only from the fruit, it was pretty tasty.

Dinner was a nice risotto with oven roasted tomatoes and scallops, and a side salad.

I am getting my energy from reading everyone's blogs...So thank you! I have loved the motivation that it provides, by reading yours and by writing my own. It is so nice to see so many of you doing this and to know I am not alone. I am in awe at the amounts of exercising I see most of you doing. I am hoping that I can get that drive... Hopefully we can pull strength and support from each others writings and be successful in our weight loss journey.

Cookie Dough

This girl's got WILL POWER!!!! Made cookies for my husband's work this morning before he left and...I didn't even eat one! My major weakness is cookie dough and...I didn't have any!!!!!

WOO-HOO!!!! I am so proud of ME!!!

Dinner was great; whole wheat pasta, fresh homemade pesto, steamed broccoli with mushrooms and onions, fresh strawberries! Yum. I Was hoping for some leftovers just for me tomorrow...my kids wiped it mostly out. I had to tell them no more so I could have some lunch tomorrow. There's just a little bit left. My kids love eating healthy and clean...I can't keep up with the costs (there are 7 of them), but apparently if mom is eating it, so are they. I made them some yummy pasta with bacon and cheese and other stuff in it...but go figure, they ate theirs and then ate all of mine. All is well. I should be grateful that my kids like all the "GOOD for you" stuff.

I got a really cool thing today. It's a screen to put on a jar and grow your own sprouts. I also got seeds for bean sprouts, radish sprouts, and alfalfa sprouts. I am excited to see how this goes. I love eating sprouts, but they are often tooooooo pricey. I'll give it a go. For $5.00 (for everything) it's worth a shot.

Still going strong! Still excited! I have opted to not weigh myself except for once a week....and it's killing me. I really want to see if I have lost any weight in the last couple of days, but I am hoping for the element of surprise to take me away.

To exercise or NOT

Does running from the door of the skating rink to the farthest away parking spot at high speed (because it was freezing out at 6am) two times count as daily exercise? If not, then I'm not doing really well this week on the exercise thing. I just don't care to exercise. I do well when I really set my mind to it, but it takes so much time out of my day!!!!! I know --get up early or stay up late. But as it is I get up close to 5:30am for my daughter's skating practice, and I already am up way too late (between 11 pm and 12:30 am) getting things done while the children are nestled all snug in their beds. So what's a girl like me to do? This is where I have a really hard time finding the motivation, the desire, the drive. Besides, exercise makes you sore and you hurt. Who would really want to do that to themselves???lol. I guess I need to do some serious thinking and find the will power in me and get dedicated to it -- if it's what I really want...and I do, I do, I do.

As far as eating goes, I am doing awesome!!! Really proud of myself, I must say! I lack no motivation at the moment on the food because I love food! Right now I am having a blast trying and making new things and calculating out what I eat. It's like a game. In fact, I have a whole list of what I am making and trying for the next 3 weeks. They are all foods I love; I'm just experimenting with new recipes. My love of food got me in the situation I am in: FAT!

Had cooked buckwheat with a tsp. of pure honey -- was fantastic. Had wonderful leftovers from last night for lunch. Made a beautiful salad for dinner with avocados, radish sprouts, romaine, tomatoes, jicama, cucumber, albacore tuna, and lemon and olive oil....mmmmmm yum. Even had a fig for dessert. Of course I had a mid-morning snack and a mid-afternoon one as well. AND BEST OF ALL I FEEL GREAT!

If only I can find a way to be as hyped about exercise as I am about food.

I'm channeling positive energy all day long by thinking skinny...thinking skinny...thinking skinny...until one day I AM SKINNY. I think I can... I think I can... I think I can... I know I can...I CAN!

Shopping...

I am so exited about eating healthy again. I have an amazing rush of enthusiasm about all the things I get to eat right now!!! I dragged my friend out shopping today, for produce, and came home with loads and loads of great stuff. I hit some amazing deals at a hole in the wall store. Got pomegranates, kumquats, beets, sprouts, mango, leeks, squash, figs, and so much more. I could go on and on and on. And I got them for fantabulous prices. The hard part is deciding what to eat next.

This morning I started out with a bowl of cooked buckwheat and dried cranberries. Tonight I made a great soup from Tosca Reno's Eat Clean Cookbook. It turned out so yummy that I'm excited to eat the leftovers tomorrow. It was split peas and veggies. I enjoyed it with spelt flour bread and pure creamed honey for a treat.

I know it has only been a short couple of days, but I am doing awesome! And that makes me feel great!

The Pants

The pants don't lie, but the blog title does...(myhoneylikesmehot)

Apparently my honey likes me any way I am, but he might really like it if I was hot...

So when picking the right "too small outfit" for my pics, I chose my very most favorite pair of pants. They were still in the closet even, so I didn't have to search for them. Why where they in the closet? Because I just "barely" out grew them and just have to drop a "couple" of pounds to fit in them again. Who am I kidding? Apparently the only person fooled is me: everyone else can see how big I am. So, funny story: I got out the pants, and thought I would be able to get them up but not buttoned because I just wore them (3 years ago). I got them to my hips, and could not manage to get them any higher... so I took them off a little discouraged. Then I thought in my head, "I JUST WORE THOSE." So I tried again, with all my might. I wiggled and pulled and sucked it all in....and just barely got them up to the rear -- barely, barely, barely. I decided I was going to take my pics in them. Well, as you can see, they look like low rider jeans...um they are not. I just couldn't get them up any higher. Funny thing is that they are soooooo tight I gave myself a headache getting in them -- lack of circulation. So I am in "the pants that don't lie." I can tell myself over and over that I just need to lose a little, but the pants are proof that I have put on a lot.

I was going to opt not to post the pics on my blog. But in an attempt to build up some more motivation for me, I am posting them out there so that everyone can see. I am really shocking myself by doing all this. So here it goes...

So ready

I feel ready. I'm ready, ready to do this. Tomorrow will start the first day of the competition. I will be taking my pictures and have to really face how I look. I have to find the right outfit (that is tooooooooo small) squeeze into it...and then watch myself shrink into it in the next few months. I think the best part about this is I am not doing this alone. I have the great support of my hubby, and fantabulous friends that are doing this with me.

Now I have to schedule and plan, 6 meals day, and 1 hours worth of exercise a day. I've done it before...I can do this for good.

When I lived in Oregon, I changed my families diet to a more natural organic one. We got rid of all prepackaged food, and anything that had additives in it. We ate very well, no refined sugars and processed flours. I even made our own crackers. We turned to things like quinoa, spelt, rye flours, etc. It is expensive and very hard to do. But I felt so good my body was getting what it really needed and a lot of TLC. So I took all the time to do that for my family only to put all the junk back on my shelves 4 years later. I have yet to decide if I can afford to do that again, amazingly the food that takes more processing (more employees to pay more steps to go through) cost less to buy...you've gotta love supply and demand. I would really like to go back to eating that way. There is a quote I read once about determining if food is good for our bodies or not...it went something like "If man has had a hand in it, it's junk." I agree. The things that they have to do to food to extend the shelf life, and make it more convenient, or even look cute and nice, are the things that are slowly killing our bodies.

I know that for me I will be trying hard to put this plan of eating back into my life. I will try to do some of it for my family. The hard thing when I make stuff for the kids and stuff for me...is that it is so much easier to eat what they eat.

Wish me luck!

Competition!

It's almost time!!! I'm so excited!!! The competition starts on Tuesday!!!! Yippy!!! So I am working on coming up with my game plan. First plan of action; I have been telling everyone about what I am doing...that way I'll look really dumb if I back out. And guess what?...that has peaked some of their interests to do it with me. I love friends.

So the competition requires that I blog once a week; I have set my goal for every day. I know me a little too well, and as the newness dies off...so do I. So in an effort to get my once a week blog in, I'm going to blog something everyday.

Well...I have been looking at my skinnier clothes, and I can't wait to fit back into them. I use to look cute...and I fixed my hair cute. It's amazing how you slowly just let yourself go...I can't wait to look the way I did before. I wish that I could magically lose all the weight overnight, but I guess I didn't gain it all overnight...so I will have to take it one day at a time. But I can't wait!!!!!

I Love Food

Well there are first times for everything...right? Yesterday I created this blog to journal a weight loss journey I am beginning. I Registered last night for a weight loss competition. I am so excited! A friend told me about this competition http://karisweightlosscomp.blogspot.com/ and I decided I had to at least try. I'm a little nervous, because I can't believe that I am posting this for the world to see. Even if it's only a few friends and other competitors looking at it, to me it feels like the whole world.

I have to say after writing my post yesterday I was surprised at the little boost of excitement, and adrenaline rush I got just for starting. So I was excited to get on and write again today, to keep that drive going.

I know I can do this. Yesterday I caught a few glimpses of pictures from a few years back...and wow...I can't believe the amount of weight I have put on. I know I've seen the numbers on the scale, and I can do the math...but seriously I don't think that I have ever really visually noticed the dramatic difference. I would love to blame the weight gain on the fact that I have 7 children, between the ages of 21 months and 8 years . But....unfortunately I can not blame any of that weight on pregnancy because I lost all of that when I had my last baby 6 years ago...the rest of my kids I had the "easier on the body way"...lol through adoption. Well I guess it's time to face reality, and realize the weight gain I have allowed to take over my body.

I think the really hard thing for me is that I LOVE FOOD! let me say it again I LOVE FOOD! I don't just like eating, I love eating, I love everything about food. I love cooking new recipes, I love baking, trying different and new things. I love the flavors. I love the colors. I love the way food looks on display. I love everything about it...it's in my blood. So I am going to have to find a way to control it....but I don't want to........I love it when people ask me for my most delicious recipes. Ahhhhhhh...just the thought of what I could make today. Yikes people what am I going to do. SO I REALLY NEED TO WORK ON....ALL THINGS IN MODERATION! I can, I can, I can...

I'm FAT

I'm FAT. Yep you got it...I'm FAT. So I'm starting this crazy blog in attempt to lose some weight. It wouldn't be New Years without having the annual resolution of losing weight, it's tradition. So in all attempts in keeping tradition alive I am taking some time today to come up with my plan of action. You know the drill, crazy charts and lists of what to eat and what not to eat. Menu options with food on them that you really don't think you can stomach.... An exercise routine that will kick you in the rear...all in hopes that you could shed a few pounds or even ounces before the next time you step on the scale. But really...

All kidding aside, I know I can do this. A few years back I lost some 32 pounds...and it was great. I want to get that drive and ambition back. So really I'm getting my act together and I'm going to do this. Why? You say why???? Well it's all in the title, "My Honey Likes Me Hot." No, honestly I felt better -- I felt great, and I loved the way I looked, and loved the boost in confidence in being successful at something. I like the way it makes me feel that I am making a difference in my life, and in my family's.

Truth be told, I like all the charts, menus and crazy exercise routines. So here I go. Charts, menus, food logs, portion control, healthy eating, weight loss journaling, dreaded before and after photos, exercise, and SKINNIER CLOTHES.

Watch out here I come!!!